Sh!++y Morning/Pukey Night

This morning, I awoke to Abby crying at 5 a.m. When I went in the room, Will saw me pick up Abby and freaked out. Therefore, I picked him up also, and we all 3 sat in the rocking chair in their room. They both fell asleep, but then, I realized I was stuck. At around 5:30, I tried to put them back in their cribs, but they both woke up. Therefore, I brought them both to our bed. At that point, Will took a major dump. Therefore, I went downstairs to change his diaper, and Abby stayed asleep with Billy and Winnie.

When I went downstairs, I discovered that I had forgotten to put the 2 lbs of chicken I breaded and cooked for them in the fridge the night before. Great. All that time, effort, and money down the toilet. I had to throw it all away. Ugh.

I changed Will’s nasty poop, and he joined me, Abby, Billy, and Winnie in bed. By then, I slept about 15 minutes, and I had to get up to shower. Perfect. Abby and Will stayed fast asleep while I showered and got dressed. When I was ready to go downstairs, Abby woke up and came down with me.

I heard Marie crying around 7:30 so I headed up to grab her. The smell of poop hit me as soon as I walked in, and I figured the pooping must have woken her up. I bring her downstairs to change her diaper and notice brown on her shirt. Yes, it’s poop, but it gets better. I look at her hands---crusty poop everywhere!! UGH! Remember, she’s thumb sucker, which means she had poopy hands in her mouth. Disgusting.

I don’t know why she has this obsession with putting her hands in her diaper and then sucking her thumb right after, but she seems to think it’s hilarious. I’ve tried ignoring her, scolding her, putting her in time out, but it doesn’t faze her. Hand in diaper + hand in mouth = Super funny to her. She looks right at me when she does it and smiles. I don't think I would be smiling if I put a hand thumb full of poop in my mouth.

I got her diaper and clothes changed and hands washed, and then, I went up to inspect her crib. Poop was on the sheets, her blanket, her pillow case. Gross. This keeps getting better.

I put that all in the washing machine on the hot/sanitary cycle, and I thought it was over, but when I went to give her a kiss, she still smelled like poop. That’s when I discovered she had crusty poop all in her hair. YUCK!!! I had to leave for jury duty at that point, so I just had to ask Michele to please wash her hair when she sat the others down for breakfast. When I talked to Billy later, I asked how the kids were after I left, and he said, “Fine, but Marie smelled like s&8+.”

This whole episode was incredibly timely because at work, we had been talking about "fecal-oral transmission" of diseases, and some people had been questioning how kids get poop in their mouths. Marie is now the poster child for fecal-oral disease transmission. I'm such a proud mom! My child can demonstrate worst practices in the public health field.

Just another morning in the Zeigler house. Good times. But wait, there's more. The evening just capped off a perfect day.

Michele (nanny) texted me late in the afternoon to inform me that Will had been feverish. She gave him some tylenol (not name brand, I know about the recall), and he seemed to be okay. I came home, hung out for a while with them, and I left Billy to put them to sleep because I was having dinner with some friends. When I came home, Will was on the couch with Billy, and he was burning up. I gave him more medicine and snuggled for a while. He asked for some cold juice, and I gave him a few ounces. After chugging that he proceeded to puke all over me, himself, and the couch, which we just had steam cleaned a couple of weeks ago. Awesome.